1/4/2021> Ate pizza (homemade) + watched China Syndrome (2nd or 3rd viewing).

1/5/2021> Ate baked salmon, potatoes + broccoletti w/ peppers + carrots. Watched Rose Island, which could of been a cool movie (based on true story about a guy who built a small island 3 miles off the shore of Italy near Rimini) but they dramatized it too much... not that the guy did much w/ this island, but he could have.

Our father died 39 years ago today. If he was still alive, today would have also been his 86th birthday. When our mother died over the summer we received some things of our dad that she had (not sure why), like flight logs + day planners.

He started flying when he was 15 then got his wings when he joined the Air Force. He had logged 1600+ hours as of 1966 + there's a whole nother log book after that where he stopped keeping a tally. He flew all over the west coast and down to Mexico + we think we remember him saying once he flew to Cuba but we can't find the entry. We only flew w/ him once or twice that we remember, once we sat on his lap + he let us take the wheel to fly around Haystack rock (or maybe this is a story we told ourself) + another time he did the upsie-downsies + it made us throw up... seems even way back when we was a kid we had issues w/ our ears + motion sickness, definitely didn't inherit our father's ears, tho like having your own private island it would be cool to have a plane + fly yourself around.

1st flights in 1950 (presumably w/ an instructor)

on the day before we were born he flew to Albany (Oregon)

He also had day planners from 1978 + 1980. Unfortunately we don't have the day planner from 1981 leading up to his suicide on Jan 5, 1982, but he attempted suicide in 1981 (also on his birthday if we remember correctly + also using the same method), tho the entries leading up to that are nothing out of the ordinary. The last entry on Jan 3, 1981 says "SVSS AM shift "to PDX 2 weeks then WTF, then quit". We think SV is our stepmother (Shirley Victoria) + SS we think is Seaside (where she lived after their divorce), but we don't know what he meant by WTF besides the obvious "what the fuck" tho can't imagine folks used that acronym back then. He uses a lot of abbreviations + acronyms + refers to cities by their flight codes (PDX for Portland, PVR for Puerto Vallarta, RNO for Reno, etc.). In the 1978 journal there's a lot of entries like "3b 3w" which we determined probly meant how many drinks he had (b for bourbon, w for whiskey + s for scotch... his drinks of choice). He was probly doing this cuz our stepmother was nagging him about his drinking. We imagine he was drinking a lot more then what he admits to in writing. He also seemed to have eaten out a lot, which was surprising cuz we only remember eating out w/ him for dinner once or twice + not once did we ever sit down as a family for dinner except maybe on Thanksgiving our Xmas. Us kids ate at the kitchen counter while he drank + ate/drank in the living room in his Lay-Z boy in front of the TV or went out to eat. And we ate cow tongue while the grown-ups ate steaks. He ate out a lot at Danny Woo's, a crappy Chinese restaurant as we remember (last time we were in Beaverton we looked for it but couldn't find it).

1/6/2021> Speaking of drinking, this insurrection in DC has almost made us say fuck it to a dry January. It ain't over yet but when the dust settles the important thing is that Georgia tipped the senate to the democrats so they can actually get shit done, but that news seems to be bumped below the fold w/ all the k-os in DC right now. It's appalling that the police just let these proud boys waltz into the senate building (taking selfies w/ them even).... if it was BLM protesters they would have been shot at, pepper-sprayed + beaten dead. And it's also surprising the National Guard wasn't called until it was too late.... didn't every 1 know this was coming? We sure did, the only difference is that we predicted Trump would try to declare martial law as a last resort (which he still might do... he is still in power for 2 weeks + could start a war) + now they're just letting them go even tho they just committed seditious treason, the most serious offense against the state. And Biden still hasn't officially been confirmed cuz of this nonsense, tho seems they're clearing the senate as we speak (7:30 PM) + they will reconvene to get 'er done tonight + Twitter + Facebook have finally blocked Trump.... hopefully we'll wake up to a new "normal" civilized world tomorrow. Speaking of, we ate linguini w/ caviar, chantarelle mushrooms + lemon zest + a salad, mozarella + garlic bread (+ tempted as we were didn't pop any wine). We weighed 169 today, 2-3 pounds more than the beginning of January! Why is it every time we try to lose weight we gain weight?