| 2021 residuals: ↄompi1ing a Σequential ream of dreams
∀11 in 1 place
2021/12/29> we'R in2 this thing where we thread actors thru sequential movies, so since we last (regretably) saw The Great Gatsby w/ Robert Redford, we rewatched All the President's Men (★★★★) + since Dustin Hoffman is als0 in it we then rewatched Marathon Man (★★), wich was pretty randum, not sure what we were thinking... think we keep wanting it 2 be abt a marathon runner
12/30> starting 2 reflect back on 2021... 4 starters naught az mush subconchus activi-T az 2020 (menE of those nocturna1 emi55ions of witch endid up in Residue) > 4 th sake of archival axessibili-T hear's all of 2021's dreams ∀11 in 1 p1ace
1/14> We were on a boat last night + started to see all sorts of wildlife: dolphins, white beluga whales, ducks, penguins + then we saw a goose w/ markings that looked Aztec but on closer inspection the markings spelled out: "I've seen this happen in other people's lives + now it's happening in mine". Sum 1 in the group joked that Morissey ripped this bird off... "guess he figured nobody would come up to the Antarctic + spot this particular breed of penguin." Even tho we were apparently in the Antarctic tons of mosquitoes were biting us.
1/17> Had to go back to work last night + evidently a few ppl in the office had tested positive for covid so we were trying to hang out by the back door (which we tried to keep open but sum 1 kept closing it) + we were being interviewed over the phone + we kept getting distracted by ppl at work + we were putting down the phone + forgetting where we put it down or what the question they had asked was.
1/19> We were bunkered in some apartment in a mall complex. We were the 1st participant that showed up for a bicycle race + started to take a spot in the corner, trying to figure out how we would ride the race inside this small apartment. Evidently u were sposed to lift the front wheel up + ride vertically against the wall + it seemed easiest in the corner. Then this French girl decked out in flashy biker gear w/ a nice bike shows up + we told her she could have the prime spot in the corner since we just had a shitty bike. We were sorta riding around wondering how they would know how far we rode + the bicycle turned into a unicycle. Some other people showed up + evidently we were to remain bunkered there + couldn't leave the house + we were wondering what we would do if more people for this bike race showed up (cuz of COVID) but evidently we had another room we could go to. The apartment was enclosed w/in this sort of atrium where this other room was on display. Evidently someone had been robbed + when they asked the security guard if they noticed anyone suspicious coming in the security guard thought they were accusing them.
1/23> We were watching a swimming race thru a swamp on what looked like closed caption TV. The cameras were terrible most of the time showing aerial views of empty patches of swamp w/ the occassoinal swimmer. U cd see crocodiles + we couldn't understand why they didn't attack the swimmers or why they would have a race like this thru a crocodile-infested swamp. Then we saw a swimmer coming close to a crocodile + the crocodile just quickly ate them in 1 bite + it seemed the judges or no 1 noticed, or if they did it just wasn't in their culture (we were somewhere in Australia or Asia) to grieve or even acknowledge death. Then we went swimming out in the ocean, surfing these big waves w/ a tube thing. There was this 1 part of the ocean where bubbles came up like there was an underwater hot spring or thermal vent.
> Then we went to a sushi restaurant w/ a few people we hardly knew + none of them had money or jobs so nobody would of been able to pay. Then we ran into some colleagues of our bedder-½ + they were going to some Belgian restaurant + we went along for the free meal but it was early + we weren't even hungry so we left. Later in the evening we were with our bedder-½ + she had to go somewhere + we were gonna meet her back at home + she was saying there was an app where u could get a cab by taking a photo of the street u live on to tell them your destination (+ u couldn't just type in names of the cross streets) + we thought this was ridiculous cuz if u cd take a picture of your street then u were close to home + may as well walk. We were walking + saw a covid center (we didn't know if it was for tests or shots) + figured since we were gonna get on a plane the next day we shd go + when we got to the register we said "I'll take 1" (cuz we were embarrassed not to know wether it was for tests or shots). She said we had to be invited + we asked how 1 could do that + she started to go into this long convoluted spiel then all these sketchy types started coming out of the woodworks like when u try to use the train ticket machines in Rome saying they overheard us asking how to get a covid shot + they were saying we could just go to nofeeadvice.com so we were trying to get away from them acting like we knew what we were doing. We found a quiet piazza + sat down at an empty outdoor table figuring we cd just google the information but then more sketchy types kept coming up to us. This 1 guy attached himself to me w/ this string + tried to act like it was accident. We ran thru this market, seemed like Asia or the street scene in Blade Runner, trying to get away from the street hustlers + also trying to put our mask on.
1/27> We were sposed to drive these folks we din't know from S.F. to L.A. today + as designated driver we wanted to get a good night's sleep last night. It was like 3:30 in the afternoon + they were itching to "do something" + had never been to wherever we were, which evidently was now D.C. cuz we told 'em maybe they'd dig Georgetown (they were European) + in our mind there was some castle/mountain there they could climb. They pointed out we had made an appointment earlier to get a tattoo (we'd all but forgotten), we had the design (a small round mandala-like thing) that were planning on getting that we kept in our wallet for safe-keeping + the appointment was 4–6 pm (or 4–8 in case the tattoo artist needed more time) + we figured it was still early enough + the design was small + wouldn't take long, tho we were slightly concerned about it hurting our arm + whether we'd be okay to drive the next day (we don't know why no 1 else was able to drive). We were waiting for the tattoo artist in ½-broken lounge chairs on the street + trying to figure out where the tattoo would go... we was thinking the upper arm but didn't know which + in the end desided our right sholder (the spot where u get shots (relevant cuz the mandala design sort of looked like a corona virus)). We aksed these strangers we were with where they were moving to + they didn't know + we was tripping out on how we would be able to move them if they didn't know where they were moving to + they said don't worry about it, that we'd figure it out when we got there. The tattoo artist came + we figured maybe we shd go to the bathroom before sitting down for 2 hours + the bathroom was this elaborate large dark velvety lounge + we couldn't really find a urinal. Sum woman was in there holding a metal cup over her breast + tenderly kissing the cup + we realized she was pumping + treating this metal cup like it was her baby + it tripped us out how far removed humuns are from their natural habitat.
1/27 Jan> Last night we went out to eat w/ this mother/son from Japan + afterwards we started walking up this cobblestoned alley in the opposite direction of our hotel which was annoying cuz we were tired + wanted to go to sleep. The son was speaking to us in Japanese + @ 1st we nodded like we understood then we told him we din't speak Japanese but he kept jabbering in Japanese. We went up these stares + ended up in this cool park that felt like the roof of the duomo in Milan but w/ more of a Latin American flair, elaborately tiled like Park Güell in Barcelona. Our bedder-½ was saying how they read about this place in Popville + was wondering where it was + we were thinking there's actually a lot of cool stuff in DC we hadn't discovered yet. It was a series of elevated sky island parks that went up + down stares + the last stares were really steep + went all the way back down to the city. By this point our bedder-½ had sped off ahead w/ the Japanese son leaving us w/ the slow-poke mom, which was surprising cuz these last steps were really steep + convoluted + we couldn't believe they had basically run them. We were going down + it got steeper in this 1 section that was almost vertical. There was a pipe running along the stairs so we reached to grab it as a handrail but it came loose + we swung out high up way over this valley, which gave us a cool view but was scary cuz we didn't know how long we could hold on. We swung all the way to the other end of this valley + back to ground level + figured we shd let go there rather than risk swinging back + not reaching the other side where we'd left off. We ended up in an enclosure w/ a bunch of penguins like it was a zoo, but it also felt like a secret government compound, perhaps an Antarctic research station. We ran back to our bedder-½ + the Japanese son acting like we had run down the stairs they had come down (not wanting to admit we grabbed the pipe cuz that was cheating), but we so wanted to tell them about the penguins. Finally we made it home but for sum reason (sumbody was talking about it earlier in the night) we had our butcher knife in bed w/ us staring at the fine detail along the edge. Our bedder-½ woke up + saw us w/ the knife + we pretended like we were psycho but she just rolled her eyes + rolled over the other way. There were these people trying to get into our place that were trapped on the window ledge + 1 of them appeared dead + we were telling our bedder-½ that perhaps we shd help them. We got up + they were all okay.
1/31> Went to sum camp in upstate NY last night. We were in line to get provisions at this shop + our college friend Mark was in line a few people behind us. We got to the front + the teller was being all chatty asking what we was gonna make + saying we were missing such + such ingreedient + we explaned how our friend Mark was in line behind us + was buying that (sumthing for Nachos). She started looking him up on the Inurnet + then he came walking by + we said we were talking about him + he started getting all chatty w/ the teller + we noticed he was actually a she, looking like a cross between Genesis P-Oridge + Tootsie. We were thinking maybe they was just dressed up but noticed she had boobs. When we got out of the shop Mark had sorta turned back into the old version of himself, tho looking + acting like Teddy in Memento. They went to check into our room + we went to hang out by the lakeshore (still w/ our bags). The cashier girl (who liked Julia Garner in Ozark/The Assistant) started talking to us + then leaning her head on our shoulder + then she started sobbing hysterically, telling us about some deep psychological issues + we wanted to console her but didn't want to get too friendly w/ her cuz we thought she might be hitting on us. Her face was all white + her tears were melting thru her caked-on foundation. We left to go to our "hotel" which was above a nightclub. Everything was all podunk + ramshackle, made of plywood. We could hear Michael Gira's wife singing that song "When Will I Return?" + when we got to the door w/ our # on it (a piece of plywood w/ a padlock) we went into our shed + Mark had all these kitschy knick-knacks organized neatly on shelves. We told him to guess who was playing + they said Swans. Evidently it was a free outdoor concert. We were in no hurry to go down there cuz we don't really like the beginning of "When Will I Return?" We eventually mozied down there + they were closing up the doors cuz nobody showed up + Swans determined it wasn't worth playing the concert. We went back to Mark + told them we blew it by not getting tix cuz we would of got to seen Swans play a show in this small club just for us in this podunk town in upstate NY.
2/3> We were annointed a kight last night. The night annointing us 1st had to bee blessed + then they turned to us + boinked us over each shoulder + told us to kneel. So we went thru some ritual getting on our knees + kissing the floor but we were in a bathroom so we din't actually wanna press our lips to the dirty tile but just pertended 2. We got 2 thinking that maybe this IDea of knighthood was a Muslim thing cuz the ritual was simalure to the Islamic prayer ritual (+ also sorta what we due each mourning to stretch our back, feet + arms (essentially a child pose into a downdog) while we wait for our coffee to brew), but now that we're a wake this idea seems ludicrus cuz these "knights" were fighting Muslims during the Crusades. The rest was hard to put into palabras cuz it was more like we were editing images, but as we changed the imedges we had to update the caption/title to "Iconic Culling of Music from Scenes of War".
2/13> We were living in this house w/ an open floor plan, th California style our bedder-½ dreams of where it's hard to distinguish when u you're inside or out + we din't halve a fence round our yard + we herd sum 1 in our backyrd so wint back + there was a girl talking on her phone. She was talking quietly + seamed cool but we were annoyed she was talking in our bckyard. We were trying to get her attn to ask "can we help u w/ sumthing?" but she just kept talking not making eye contact or eggnowledging she saw us. @ 1st we was thinking she had a lot of nerve but then thought it was kinda cool dat she felt comfortable enough to just walk into sum stranger's yard. Finely she got off th fone but before we cd say sumping she said "ahhh, it's such a nice day out" + took a seat in 1 of our lounge chairs out by the pool + we looked up @ the sky + sure enough, it was beautiful out + then we was feeling guilty we wasn't enjoying our nice backyrd on such a nice day. Our bedder-½ came out + started chatting w/ this grrl + then they went "inside" (again, everything was ½-inside ½-outside w/ no doors) + then as if we wasn't xciting enough company she called sum guy on her phone to tell him come on over. She told us we'd like this guy, that he used to be in Kiss + our bedder-½ said which 1 + started to get into a conversation trying to figure out which 1 not by their name (Gene Simmons was the only name we knew) or instrawment they playd but by what kind of facepaint they wore, like, "the guy w/ th star over his eye?" This Kiss guy walks in + he's handsome + polite + it's weird to see him w/o his facepaint + we're like "yah, we recognize wich 1 it is." He introduced himself + shook hands + we were all just hanging out + then a few of his friends started showing up + ppl were mingling in + out + it occured to us our place was a cool place to hang out. We walked back + there was a dozen or more ppl, sum waiting for the bathroom as if our place was a restraunt or bar. We went back to th table where th Kiss guy + this grrl + our bedder-½ were + evidently a movement was afoot to hit some club our restraunt + they were talking logistics, like shd we take 1 or 2 cars + we looked back + now there's tons of ppl in our house + we tell our our bedder-½ we don't feel like going out + then say we probly shouldn't leave th house when there's 100s of ppl in it + she said we were exaggerating, implying we was being up tight + shd chill out. We said ok, there's like 100 ppl + they were all xploring deep into our house + upstairs into our bedroom. We walked w/ our bedder-½ bac thru the house + said it was getting out of cntrl that we shd be keeping an eye on things + she agreed. We speculated dat this grrl probly called all her friends + told them to come over + dat it was all a scam + they wd rob us but every 1 was being casual + chill just hanging out. We had this spirel staircase going up to our bedroom (like the 1 we had on via Titta Scarpetta) + all these ppl were coming down so we couldn't go up. This 1 guy in a puffy jacket looked at us defensively + said, "what? U want to search me?" Mostly we were thinking about our guitar + musickle instrawments, we din't really know what else there was of val-u to take. But we couldn't get up the stairs to check cuz so menny ppl were coming down.
2/27> Went to a launch party for our bedder-½'s new book. They got the 1st batch from the printer + we opened them up to look @ them + they were crap... binding was coming apart, cover was a taped-on piece of thin white paper w/ ½ the ink faded, everything about it was shoddy. All our bedder-½'s friends + family were there + every 1 was disappointed + depressed, kind of resigned to "oh well." We was looking at it + telling her publisher that it was unnacceptable + they were shrugging their shoulders + agreeing + we said she shouldn't have to pay for it + they agreed. We told our our bedder-½ we could have new copies printed in 2 weeks + they would be great quality + cheaper than what they paid. We had wondered why they hadn't just asked us (Calamari) in the 1st place, but it was a reputable big university press, we all had assumed they would do a good job since they had a good reputation. We told them we'd been using bookmobile for almost 20 years + they hadn't fucked up a single batch, except early on one batch w/ slightly the wrong color + they made good on those. So we told her publisher to pull all the copies that had gone out to bookstores, that this reflected poorly on our our bedder-½ + they agreed w/ everything we said. Our bedder-½'s family was all drowning their sorrows + we were trying to tell them it was all gonna be OK. We were walking home along the edge of this river that was all muddy + we all had to take off our high heels.
2/17> We were visited by a # of birds last night, 1st we was travelling sumwhere + ppl kept giving us animals or we won them as prizes but it stressed us out cuz we din't halve anywhere to put them + not able to care for 'em since we was travelling. But we also din't want to offend the ppl that gifted em to us. When finally no 1 was looking we opened our backpack + started letting the animals go... a few pidgins flew off, sum chickens ran off + there were sum other birds + maybe a turtle, don't totally REMember but there was also a little parrot that just sorta fell to the ground rather than fly off. They wasn't dead but wasn't able to fly + we felt terrible for neglecting them (they'd been in our backpack all day). We got a cuddlebone + broke it in ½ + the parrot started going to town on it, chomping on the chalky yellowish marrow in the middle. The parrot said "that's just what i needed". They ate the cuddlebone + was then able to fly. They flew over to a plate + scratched their beak on it + we tried to ask what they were looking for, "water? Something to file your beak down? We thought that's what cuddlebones were for?" But the parrot didn't speak back.
4/15> Herd our bedder-½ rustling round + drinking water @ 3:33 a.m. so we said ciao + they mumbled sumping a bout a dream they had where we were waiting 4 a boat in Tieland, 2 go 2 sum I-land. we had 2 get all our provisions like shrimp, lobster, etc. cuz there was nothing on this I-land + we were haggling w/ the boat guy cuz they had changed the price + these other fancy-pants shyknees tourists w/ a Thai interpreter were pushing us aside + sweet-talking him 4 a deal + our bedder-½ mumbled about how annoying this all was, the hassles of travelling. meanwhile in our headspace we were in the mountins sumwhere in Cali4nia + we saw this small private jet that had landed on this tiny airstrip + we made our usual comment like "what kind of assholes have planes like this" when secretly we were jealous cuz it wd be so cool 2 have a private jet + be able 2 fly around el moondough. we were looking inside it, there was dozens of bratty kids lounging around w/ no safety belts, shit layin around all over, overhead bins open as they were taking off + then we were thinking wait a minute, we're watching this from the inside, we're on this plane! we had a ticket 2 go 2 San Diego on Air China + evidently our flight was overbooked + they maid arrangements w/ this plane 2 take us. then it occurred 2 us that they were probly going strait 2 China so we aksed the pilot (the father), "you're dropping us off in San Diego, rite?" but he wasn't planning on laying over there + we was starting 2 panic saying we din't halve no visa 4 China + din't want 2 fly all the way there just 2 be sent back. he was fumbling thru his personal FX trying 2 find the # of sum 1 he cd call 2 change his flight plan + @ 1 point axidentally dropped sum U-lock keys out the window.
5/ 6> Last night there was sum sort of crime committed + a bunch of wanna-be sleuth types went to this park to hunt for evidence before the police closed the park off as a crime scene. We were trying to be inconspicuous since we weren't sposed to be looking for evidence + since the park had a lot of homeless people (felt like People's Park in Berkeley) we carried a mattress on our back. The mattress gave us an excuse to go slow + look at the ground to scan for clues, but we couldn't use our hands to pick anything up since we was holding onto the mattress. There was another guy next to us that was being far less discreet + we told him to chill out, that they'd kick us all out if they cot us sleuthing + that we'd tell him if we saw sumthing. He was saying the smoking gun was a book + started to grab 1 + we said no not that 1, that we'd remember which book it was when we saw it + then we saw it, sumthing w/ "Snipes" or "Snopes" in the title. So he grabbed the book + tucked it into his jacket + we fled the park. We walked back to an apartment + we went to drop off the mattress + also a bike that we'd apparently been riding. This other guy waiting for the elevator was like look at that asshole wanting to be the hero + it was the guy who we told to pick up the Snipes book, talking to the media + holding up the book bragging about how he found the smoking gun. We said yah we know, that we were the 1 who spotted it + he said we shd go say sumthing but we said we didn't care + had to drop off our stuff 1st. We crammed into an elevator + pressed the top floor button but could feel the elevator going down. We got off in the basement + walked around back to the lobby + before we got back to the elevator these 2 girls ran ahead + crammed into the elevator w/ the guy + he was laughing at us like haha + we said it was ok, we'd take the stairs. The stairs u also had to push a button for + wait + it was sum complicated contraption that ran vertically at a slight slant. Sum woman who knew how it ran was telling us how to work it, pressing buttons on + off cuz we'd pressed the wrong 1. There was about a dozen of us crammed in this thing + we got to the 4th floor but rather than stop, the sideways elevator went into a vertical shaft + we started falling in free-fall. It seamed to take forever + our ears were popping + we had lots of time to ponder weather 4 floors was enough to kill us or just maim us. We hit the ground but we din't feel no pain + then next thing we knew we were laying in a hospital bed. We felt normal, but didn't want to check beneath the blankets to see if we still had legs. There were other victims there + we asked the nurse if every 1 lived + she said no.
5/11> We were travelling sumwhere + fell in w/ a group of travellers, 1st on a boat in the rain, then we were driving a VW bug ('70s or '80s) + we was bragging that we had a '66 + this other girl said she had a '32 bug + we said u beat me, how did u get that? + she said her dad was a car dealer. We said '65 was the best year cuz of the headlights, how they gave them eyelashes. Then we got rammed in the side by sum other car. We got out fearing there'd be sum argument but this girl gets out saying "I'm so ditzy, sorry" + hands us 2 electronic bracelets + we had no idea what they were but evidently it’s what people do when they get in accidents these days. We said shouldn’t we at least get your name + address? 1 of our fellow travellers opened a notebook 2 take notes but this girl was reluctant 2 give her real name. Then we left in this bug, which cd barely even start on a hill. When we finally got 2 the destination, (sum locker room where we were sposed 2 shower b4 we got massages + our bedder-½ was there + we was telling them about our crazy ordeal, how these people we was with were arrested 4 shoplifting, how we were in an accident + other events we didn’t toetilly remember.
5/15> We were driving against last night, in a big Suburban, but don't member much else except all the passengers were so tall that their heads hit the ceiling + this made us really claustrophobic + we were going on 2 our bedder-½ (the onely other short person) about the merits of headroom + high ceilings.
6/11> Saw our mom for the 1st time since she died last summer. We were at her house in Mexico + these ppl were going door-to-door offering to paint houses + assign a name of a spirit animal. We said chiva (goat) but then said we better clear it w/ our mom since it was her house so we went down to this cafe where she was hanging out. She was laying on the counter cuz she was too big to sit in a chair, lounging across + almost falling off at 1 point. She was w/ some dapper old guy + they were shooting the shit having a good time + we told her there were ppl at the house to paint it + assign a spirit animal so she got the check + they gave her change in $50 + $13 dollar bills (not sure what the currency was but the bills were all colorful) + she had to ask them to change it into smaller bills so she could leave a tip. We started walking back to the house + was worried she wd have a hard time walking but she was super energetic + sprightly, almost running. We said u must be tired after the long flight + she said to the contrary, that she had pent up excess energy. We asked who the guy was + she said it was sum guy who was on her flight just to steal her pot + we said that din't make sense, that he shd of been on her return flight, that no body would bring weed from the U.S. to Mexico. We got back to her place + these people were painting all the houses tacky bright colors + there was new graffiti in the time span since we went to get our mom. Can't member what we decided about a spirit animal.
6/26> We were boarding a plane + it was taking every 1 forever to get settled, playing musical chairs so ppl could sit where they wanted to sit + we got the last available seat + finally we got settled but then there was this family w/ kids loitering around in the aisle + then this person in a wheelchair accidentally fell into this crack between the wall + floor + fell 2-3 stories down into the luggage compartment below + our 1st reaction was great, now we're never gonna take off. They got the person quickly to a doctor + had to await status + then we were taxing across the runway + these 4 hoodlums were following beneath the plane harassing us + trying to intimidate us, like they were taking the plane hostage. We were hoping the plane would run them over, they were running in front of the wheels + the plane went faster then they could run. We got to this little clinic where evidently they had taken the women. She came out w/ her doctor + they gave us the thumbs up + then pointed to the 4 hoodlums, as if this was proof that they did it + that's all the aircrew in the cockpit needed, visual proof of liability, + now we were clear for take-off. We were amazed + glad we were gonna take-off on time, but also surprised this would hold up in a court of law, that they didn't need to fill out any paperwork.
6/28> Was on a train don't know where but we had a 2-3 hour layover so we got off + walkd around the city. We saw a zoo in the distance + walked twards it. There were giraffes + elephants etc. that u cd see from the outside, all in the same enclosure. Then there was this tiger cub walking next to us twards the enclosure. Seamed like it wanted to get in + we contemplated picking it up + throwing it over the fence, but the little tiger found this little hole to get back in, presumably the same hole it snuck out from. Right when it got in it turned around + squeezed back out thru the same hole + a lion cub followed it, as if the tiger specifically went in just to show the other animals how to get out. Then a larger male lion cub w/ a mane starting to came thru the hole... it was like w/ each animal that squeezed thru the hole started to get bigger. We weren't so worry about the first small cubs, but they were starting to get bigger + we got worried. We started to run but then had to scamper up these cliffs that was hard to go fast + then we were climbing almost vertical + realized paying attention to the route in front of us was more important than just running blindly ahead. We downclimbed + found an easier way up to the top.
7/10> We were at sum sorta training, 1st in what felt geographically like San Diego + then down to the tip of Baja but we don't member how we got there. We was in the middle of a 2-3 hr test + was in "a zone," cranking out answers to every question but after it was done we had the slightest idea what it was about or weather we did well. After handing in our test (we were 1st to finish) we asked the instructr if we cd go back to the rm to get sumthing + asked if it was 2 the left + then a right + he said yes + then we started to go then stopped + asked "or, are u sure it's not right + then to the left" + he just acted like whatever it's all the same + we wanted to take a diffrent scenic way so went that way + ended up @ sum hotel + asked if they had rooms + this bellhop girl (strait out of a Wes Anderson flick) said they were bookd + we asked if there were any other hotels + she said yah + rote sumthing down on a piece of paper abt how we had to go in2 this underground speak-ez + ask if there was a train to such + such place + we said we din't want to go this place + the bellhop girl said it was all coded landgauge 2 ask for a room cuz it wasn't a legal hotel. We left the hotel glad we weren't staying there cuz there were all these dumb gringos being idiots. We wanted to take yet a diffrent way back then the way we came, back 2 the testing center, so we took the middle road, swearing under our breath @ all the annoying turistas. The path was flooded + we were wading hip-deep in water + was thinking it'd take us 4ever + it was around 6 or 7 + we didnt want 2 miss dinner. We started 2 go back but then realized the water was flowing, like a canal + we was able 2 swim @ a decent clip + by the looks of it (the snippets we cd see between trees) it was quite scenic, there was a towering Aztec castle overhead that looked like Taos + we cd hear + get glimpses of a distint waterfall so started to get worried that the canal we were in might lead 2 it but the canal was going uphill twards this castle on the mountain + we was thinking this was impossible, that the canal was defying gravity by going uphill + we reckoned the only way it was possible was if it was reeeaaally deep + we were swimming in the very top portion of the canal. We saw this other nice hotel that was ½ empty + wondered why that bellhop girl didn't tell us about this 1 cuz it seemed legit + hip. We went in + our cousin was in the lobby + asked to see sumthing but didn't articulate what it was, but apparently we needed sum paper 2 bee in this country. We showed him our itinerary + our passport + then the receptionist got involved asking 4 sumthing, also mumbling under her breath + we said they had 2 tell us xactly what we needed + displayed all our documents + showed how they were all in order but they didn't seem satisfied but we said if they couldn't articulate what they wanted then we were free to go. We had unpacked our entire bag in the process + had to pack it all back together + realized our jacket wasn't in there. They were all fixing to leave (they also had packed their bags + stowed them away) + we were saying that sumbody had our jacket. We thought it was accidental but then was realizing this entire thing (them demanding to see our papers) was all a ploy to get us to empty out our bag so they cd steal our jacket. We asked our cousin to check his bag, that mayb he'd accidentally put it in his bag. We acted like it wasn't a big deal, that we probly wouldn't need the jacket cuz it was warm + tropical + went on how we didn't particularly like the jacket, but it was our mom's coat that she had given to us. He hemmed + hawed + kept changing the subject + we never got our mom's jacket back.
7/11> We were on a plane, don't know where. The seating was more like a movie theatre. We sat behind K [hipster NYC girl] then L [friend, who also happens 2 be K's ex-roomate] wanted 2 show us something so went + sat next 2 her. She was asking our opinion of 20 interactions @ a deli counter (being displayed up on the screen). @ 1st we thought they were her real-world interactions but then realized they were comedic skits that were hilarious + were part of a TV series she had called 20 Interactions @ a Deli Counter. 2 the left of was sitting sum woman who was breastfeeding + we got stuck holding the baby in place + it was awkward cuz if we left she might be offended but it was creepy we were holding the baby while she was breastfeeding. She didn't really know what she was doing, not holding the baby properly so if we let go the baby would have just fallen 2 the floor. It was getting 2 that point in the flight where every 1 was dozing off + we didn't want 2 be stuck sitting next 2 this breast-feeding mom. We wanted 2 go sit w/ K [who was really J] + tell her about L's TV show.
8/6> in Σum foreign country, can't member where, in a sprawling mall complex > 1 saw 0 (f.k.a. bedder-½) in an auditorium w/ sum of their colleagues, even tho we were sposed 2 bee "on vacation"... this was considered "entertainment" > a lecture about the quantum physics of ecology > figgered we'd sit in on it 4 fun > there wasn't a seat open next to 0 so we sat a few seats away > the seats were weird + crammed 2gether so the onely place 1 cd put our feet were on the armrests of the ppl in front + our knees were right next 2 their heads > a colleague of 0 saw us + said hi + we stood 2 hug them but 1 didn't member who they was > we sat back down + was crammed even more, so tight 1's body formed the seat 4 the person in front + we was looking around + noticing no 1 had masks so we put our mask on + a few other ppl followed suit > there was a massive IMAX screen displaying all the physics equations of the none universe > 1 was studying em trying 2 figger out how they all fit 2gether but there was a huge swath in the middle 4 special relativity that we din't understand (I.R.L. that's the grayest area 4 us, at least the math around it) + we was wondering if 1 person was accountable 4 such a big area (Einstein), who was smarter than them that cd dubble-check their work? + how deependant we were 2 just trust that they was right > we looked down @ the ground in the aisle + there were all these decaying bones sum still w/ meat on em + rats were coming out of holes in the bones + running back in like they were the tunnels where they lived, in the marrow > we pointed these out to 1 of 0's colleagues + told em 2 tell 0 > it was like it was tidal, water wd swell up in the mess of bones + the rats would come out + then the water wood retreat + so wd the rats > we noticed the seats we were sitting on were all connected 2 this reef of bones + freaked out standing up + telling folks we needed 2 get 2 higher ground > we was clambering up this crumbly bone structure + realized it was actually a coral reef that was part of the demonstration (the reef was man-made) > every 1 was climbing all over it but the announcer wasn't telling folks not 2, just pointing out the feetsures > it was very colorful + delicate + we walked along in bare feet trying 2 be as careful as we cd
9/8> Saw Gian last night + we was like «hey, ain't u supposed 2 be dead?» + he laughed + said «sssshhh» > we asked if we were the onely person who could see him or cd every 1 but he didn't answer, just said he wanted 2 see his publicist, who was a doctor @ sum hospital, so in order 2 get in he'd fake an injury he said as he smashed his head against the hood of a car > he saw sum passerby + told us 2 get their attn + say we'd bin in an accident > so we got the guy's attn to help carry Gian's body who by this point had turned in2 a woman so was rather light > the guy was trying to help us carry Giancarla but was making it more difficult, it was easier 2 just carry her cradled in our arms + appartently all we really needed anyway was this guy as a witness, 2 attest that the accident had occurred > we entered the hospital + called for a gourney but can't remember what happened after that
9/22> Joe Strummer invited us 2 dinner > we volunteered 2 cook but all he had were cans of beans + flavored chili meat > his place was a mess w/ ½-eaten bowls of chili that we couldn't decide whether to just mix in2 the new pot we were making, but didn't know how long they had been sitting out > by this point he'd turned in2 Gordon Lish + was out back drinking whiskey w/our bedder-½ + sum other ppl while we cooked
9/24> then we were going thru sum sort of subway stn + there were all these pelicans + we felt bad making them all move out of the way > they ran off in front of us + when we rounded the corner couldn't figure out where they went cuz there was nowhere 2 fly off 2, then discovered they'd packed their bodies like sardines in2 the small overhanging spaces beneath the steps
11/18> dreamt about ourself in 3rd person (for 1st time ever) doing mindless tasks like tally'n up sum #s + then wondered (in R dream) if we'd wake up dead b/c it's like the myth how if u die in your dream u die in real life > woke up (not dead obviously) + googled «what does it mean if u dream in 3rd persun»
12/25> bot a vi0lin + changed the $trings but figured we shd get a b/u replacement set + wile we was @ it we needed mand0lin strings > went 2 this little music shop where this guy—surfer type from San Diego that l∞ked like Paul Giamatti's meathead friend in Sideways—knew me... we’d bin there urlier in the day 2 get guitar $rings, but he was acting like we were old friends > he said the vi0lin we’d have 2 bring in2 the shop 2 have them swap out the $trings, wich we thought was weird b/c we’d changed them R-selves earlier > we left the vi0lin in a nearby h0tel but got lost retracing R way back + then found this shortcut down these grand stares in2 an underground train station + we went in2 this little br∞m closet bathr∞m where evidently we put R vi0lin > we saw a vi0lin + grabbed it then realized it wasn’t Rs > this othr guy dat l∞ked like Miles Davis showd up... he als0 worked @ the music shop + apparently this was where ppl left vi0lins 2 re$tring + when they were done they wd return them hear > we Xplained 2 Miles Davis dat R violin wasn’t there where we left it but another 1 was + he said it happend all the time, that ppl axidentally t∞k the rong violin, acting like it din’t matter, dat vi0lins = non-Unique + interchangeable like a Unit of current-C > we l∞kd around th bathr∞m + found another vi0lin undr th toilet but this wasn’t Rs either > then we told Miles David we didn’t need th $rings N-E-ways b/c we'd just replaced them but just wanted 2 have Xtra $trings on hand + he was souprized we’d changed them R-selves + we showed hym how we did it (sum complic8d proseedure dat involved tying th nu $trings 2 th old 1s + pulling 'em thru sum slot + adjusting tension by twisting 'em 2gether) > then we were hanging out w/ this Mile Davis guy along a canal > we saw this owL on the grnd that wasn’t l∞king s0 g∞d, cd barely walk + was falling 0ver > it was on the other side of a fence + we were glad b/c we din’t want 2 deal w/ taking it 2 N animal resc-U place so we just ignored it but we were watching it out of the coroner of R I + it fell in2 the water + the 2nd it hit the water it B-came N agile swimmer as if it had turnd in2 an otter ⊕ cormorant > we were thinking it was kinda c∞l just hanging out w/ Miles Davis + dat the San Diego surfer bra knew R name + was thinking we shd B-come friends w/ guys like this
12/28> 1ater in th nite (⊕ thi5 AM) R bedder-½ worked az a sorta f1oral D-ziner/artist (mixing in othr L-ements) dat made arrangements 4 Jimi Hendrix (eveN tho Jimi = dead) + we made a1bum covers 4 o1d music by dead mu5icians a1readE recorded in the '60-70s using fotografs 5um 1 Ls t∞k of b1dgs + arkitexture > we din't no who = R M-p1oyer ⊕ what = Economic viabi1i-T of thi5 work ⊕ Y we did it ⊕ 4 whom
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